Kids in the Kitchen
Last week I beheld a new level of business torment.
A woman devoid of support and overrun by systems, elements and offspring.
How do people manage to combine kids and commerce?!
Hot Mama
I was visiting a packing-and-sending place.
It was hot out and not much better in, as a loading bay countered the office air conditioning.
After a while, a flushed woman emerged from a corral of half-wrapped plasma screens.
Her smile was drawn.
To her right, a baby inched off a foam mat.
From another room came toddler talk, followed by a clattering sound.
‘What are you doing, Jason?’
…
‘Jason?’
CRASH!!!
The woman dashed to the noise.
Maid to Measure
She returned to the counter with an apology.
I asked for a quote to send my package.
She rifled back and forth through a price book that looked as worn as she did.
Finally, with what seemed great mental effort, she calculated the fee.
I chose to buy cardboard tubing and post it myself.
As the woman cut the tubing to size, she nudged the baby back onto the mat and glanced to her left for Jason.
He emerged from her right and confronted me with a large, whippy, metal tape measure.
The woman disarmed him and shepherded him back with the tube before laying it on the counter.
‘Five dollars, thanks.’
‘No worries; could I have a receipt please?’
‘Sure.’
Money Pit
As she took out an old-fashioned receipt book, the phone rang: a customer inquiry.
She put the prospect on hold, fished for carbon paper and failed find a blank receipt.
She fossicked in a drawer for another book with such mounting despair that I told her not to worry.
But she pressed on, scribbling out the details of a cancelled receipt and writing mine.
I apologised for taking up so much of her time for a measly five bucks.
She nodded her thanks and returned to the phone, but the prospect had hung up.
Jason vanished.
The baby crawled.
The plasma screens beckoned.
And the hot wind slammed the front door behind me.
Family Matters
I simply could not work under these conditions.
Could you?
Do you?
Do you know others who juggle business and family?
Tell us a story!
We’re sitting comfortably …
Please begin.
Paul Hassing, Founder & Senior Writer, The Feisty Empire
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Hi Paul,
Yes I do juggle business & family- but my business IS the family.
AS you are probably aware (from twitter & previous comments) I am mother to 5 young boys aged between 12 & 2.
Running my family is ALOT like running a business. People management, financial management, in-goings, out-goings, time management, dealing with customer conflict (ok it’s between the kids but you get my drift) , research & development etc etc.
It NEVER surprises me that mothers make fabulous workers and generally are pretty darn successful when they turn their talents to business. The ability to multi task and manage all of the above are what us mothers do EVERY day at home.
There is a saying “if you want something done, give it to a busy mother…..”
What I am getting at is that YES mothers are great at combining business and motherhood…..it’s the emotional choices of dividing your time between the two that is harder.
Thank you, Ruth. As a childless man, I was hoping to get a qualified opinion. And they don’t come much more qualified than yours! A great start to today’s discussion.
*high fives* Ruth.
Paul, that scenario sounds like a nightmare, but I’ve worked through both pregnancies & toddler years. For me the trick is to get the urgent, people-facing work stuff done whilst bub is napping (inc returning phone calls). I tell people the best way to reach me is by email, cause I can flick back a quick reply on my mobile phone whilst I’m preparing lunch or the toddler is having a snack. And up until this year, my work hours were pretty much 10am-11:30am then 7:30pm till …. sometimes midnight.
What’s made this possible is working from home and having a husband who does the majority of our customer facing work.
This year, Miss 5yrs is at prep and Miss 1yr is at childcare 4 days a week during school hours. I have all of this extra work time on my hands and it feels wonderful
Damn fine work, Sonia! Doesn’t sound like you vegged on the sofa with Oprah and choccies too often. Thank you for sharing.
My wife doesn’t work because looking after three kids is a full time job. We are fortunate to have that choice, many don’t.
Those mums who do both I salute you as it’s a monumental effort. I watched my mother work full time then rush home to cook dinner, help with homework and do all of the housework.
Dads didn’t do much around the house back then, especially mine!
One of our best salespeople, the manager of our commercial team, has a blended family of 6 kids, a regular Brady Bunch. Just to add to the workload she had another to make a lucky seven.
Her husband had to prise the Blackberry from her grasp when she was in labour. The baby needed 2 weeks care in hospital so she decided to use the time by coming back to work despite our protests!
Amazing.
Great story telling Paul, really engaging.
Wow, Malcolm; you’re not a shabby teller yourself! Thank you for those gripping images of life in BOTH lanes.
Juggling the toddlers and re-directed phone calls is my personal favourite – the mad scramble out the door onto the deck with pen and paper in hand whilst the kids look mournfully out through the window.
Oftentimes it is not appropriate to relate to a corporate client that you are ‘working from home’ after 3pm on Tuesdays.
And the visual of me flailing my arms in a ‘calm down’ semaphore whilst trying to sound composed – not frantically breathless.
Or another time taking orders leaning on the roof of the vehicle with the kids screaming in the back seat…
It does plateau and get a bit easier, doesn’t it?
Welcome back GGB. Toddler juggling does sound arduous!
The question of telling clients what we’re up to is interesting. If I take Friday morning off to help my dad in the garden, or take my doggies to the vet, does that make me less professional or more human in a client’s eyes?
From what I read, the plateau these days cuts in at around age 22, then recommences six months later when prodigal ankle biters realise how good they had it with you and move back in.
I hope things get easier for you soon!
All I can say is: my wife finds it hard enough to manage a part-time job from home, with no client facing time, along with our 20-month-old and #2 on the way. So, she’ll be a full-time mum from later this year.
I hope my business will be able to pick up the shortfall, but if it can’t, we’ll just have to cut back and live a simpler life. Some have no choice but to juggle kids and work (e.g. single parents), others feel compelled to do it by their lifestyle choice, others do it for their sanity (needing work as a stimulant). I daresay lifestyle wins more often than it should, but that might be unfair
Thank you for favouring us again so soon, Luke!
I heard the other day that fathers are spending more time with their kids, but not in the traditional this-is-how-you-change-a-tyre ’skill transfer’ way.
Rather, they’re driving their children to and from swimming, cricket, footy, lacrosse, ballet, macrame, caber tossing etc and sitting in the car watching them from afar.
I find this sad. I got more of a kick learning how to fix stuff at home than I did from any organsised extracurricular event. I wonder what you and the others think of this element of ‘modern’ parenting.
Another great subject. Although I can’t add my own personal experience here (my partner is raising 3 at home but doesn’t have to work at the moment, although as has been pointed out, it can get very crazy at times and managing them is more than a full time job).
What I can do is point you to a website that I read regularly which assists mothers/partners who want to work from home. It is actually a recruiter who helps you find this type of work (legitimate work, not that dodgy ’stay at home and earn thousands’ nonsence that the internet is full of).
http://www.yourbalance.com.au/
Glad you’re digging the scene, MCB. I’ve not seen that website and it looks like a keeper. Thank you kindly!
Hi
I have been reading these blogs off and on with interest for the last few months and have been tempted to say something a couple of times but this one seemed the right one.
I have worked from ‘home’ for the last 7 years (ish), initally starting when my boy was 11 and daughter 6. The vision created by GGB brought back many memories so yes it does get better!
I was always upfront with my clients and told them that I worked from home and if was unobtainable due to school activities I would tell them, 99% were more than understanding and I think placed value in the fact that I wanted to do things with the kids.
Happily I have a very supportive husband that shared the load, in fact took over much of the household stuff and still does, especially when I have urgent things occurring.
I dont think I always get the work/life balance right but I think I have it better than some.
Hi, Nicky. Sorry for the the system delay. It often happens with first-time comments.
Thank you for reading and for taking the next step and commenting. You’ve just joined the 1%. It’s not for everyone, but we welcome every view. And now yours! Best regards, P.
I’m constantly grateful for technology that enables parents to work from home. I’m thrilled that I can connect with clients and present a professional image whilst buried amongst toy trains and Vegemite sandwiches. The biggest reward is being here for my kids. The biggest challenge is being here for my kids! If they want food, work waits. If they need attention, work waits. If I’m asked to navigate Donkey Kong to the next bunch of bananas, work waits! Work usually waits until the late night hours. Aaah, peace and quiet. That is of course until the youngest wakes me up! It’s tiring, but my deadlines are always met. I remind myself it’s only for a short time… and I’m certainly NOT alone. I choose to enjoy the ride.
What a generous vista into your life, Shona. These candid snaps paint a whole new picture of small business owners. The things you achieve with grace under pressure aren’t in the least bit small!
Another super post Paul. I don’t have wee bairns, and whenever I whinge to myself about being too ‘busy’, I remember the folk as does have wee bairns, and realise I know nothing.
Will try and get my face reattached to my posts … new email address (and website; thanks for noticing) has scuppered my gravatar.
Thanks again for prompting such lively debate. A most enjoyable part of my week!
Thank you, Ad. From what I hear, your four-legged friend has given you a pretty convincing simulation of caring for a child.
You got me there Paul … my heart goes out to your pack and send lady. Phew! But her story definitely strikes a chord. At least most of the time I can avoid being customer-facing in my work, well physically customer-facing anyway. But sometimes gathering enough wits together to calculate the BAS (love the question about how much time did this form take you to complete… would that be elapsed time Mr ATO?!) or pickup bank reconciliations that have 5 times between commenced and then dropped in just the kind of ‘Jason?????’ incident you describe I sometimes wonder exactly how inefficient I can be.
I once had to write a letter to the ATO apologising because I couldn’t remember if I had lodged something (heavily pregnant… but still). [they never replied...]
Running a business and looking after little kids full time is truly a 24/7 enterprise on all fronts – hats off to those Mums who accomplish it all, sometimes I think getting a ‘real’ job might just be the break I need
I’m rapt you dropped in, Liz. You’ve just had No. 2, haven’t you? I often picture you surrounded by the materials and machines of your business and wonder how you keep everyone safe.
Don’t get me started on Business Activity Statements. I think my record is 10.5 hours. My bookkeeper laughingly pens ‘10 minutes’ in that box. But it ain’t no laughing matter to stupies like me.
Thank you very much for your return visit.
Speaking of packaging, it occurred to me that some new readers may not have seen this good-news story:
http://mybrc.myobnet.com/2010/03/16/boxing-clever/
As a single mum and smallbiz owner, I have to agree with much of what has been said. BUT the real issue is not the kids, it’s the HUGE, HAPPY, NOISY, HYPER, LABRADOR. Kids can be bribed, or taught to write their requests on notes and hand them to you while you are on the phone, But a labrador? One noise miles away and he is off and barking. Unstoppable. (But it a testament to the power of a dog to win your heart that we still adore him. Seriously.)
Hi, Joanna. That must be fun when you’re on a video Skype call to The New York Times!
My Jack Russell Terrier sleeps beside me all day every day. Except when I wind her up …
That is hysterical – if I did that with our lab, house would be destroyed
Hee hee. So, your home is ’sans lapin’.
Or, as the English clumsily term it: ‘not with the rabbit’.
Sans lapin, sans chocolat, sans socks, sans almost anything that the dog might swallow. So far, the only known substances he will not eat are a) lemons, b) mushrooms and c) antibiotic tablets.
Ha ha! I think the correct expression for that state of affairs is: ’sans choy bow wow’!
We run a small cafe/shop in regional Vic, specialising in “local” stuff. 3 small boys, 2 dogs, 2 guinea pigs and a cat at home. One of us teaches 1 day a week, 1 creates budget small-biz websites. I have to say the story starting this blog elicits a very different reaction from me now than it would pre-cafe!
Those without experience will view the woman as incompetent and/or unprofessional. I would have a heap of sympathy. 2-year-olds just don’t seem to understand the concept of being quiet while on the phone. AND they have the most amazing knack of wandering in with a smelly bum right in the middle of a task that you HAVE to complete….
Anyway, it is absolute murder. But like was said before, once you get to the point of daycare and even (most fantastic) 5-days-a-week of school, things get so-o-o-o much better. So hang in there anyone who’s despairing, it really does get better and that huge dent in your productivity can be recovered!
Welcome, Tony. It sure has been a good week for new commenters!
It’s great to get a perspective from outsite the big smokes. Don’t be surprised if some of our readers turn into website clients. There’s a lot of demand for good, reasonably priced IT.
Best regards and please come back soon!
Here’s how Dannii does it:
http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/life-style/family-finances/dannii-minogue-urges-women-to-stop-trying-and-start-delegating-20110321-1c2qh.html