Stage Fright
The first project for a new client always puts me on edge. Even though I know I have the skills (having done similar work many times before).
I worry on the weekend and wake at night.
As soon as I start the job, however, my fear dissipates – as for a soldier on a mission that has finally begun.
I’m still surprised when veteran actors admit stage fright on opening nights (or even every night). Yet now I appreciate how they feel.
So, does stage fright haunt every theatre of small business?
-
Do builders fear new houses?
-
Do painters fear new walls?
-
Do IT guys fear new websites?
-
Do caterers fear new functions?
-
Do teachers fear new classes?
-
Do consultants fear new clients?
-
Do podiatrists fear new feet?
If you get stage fright, how does it manifest, how do you deal with it and at what point in the work process does it stop (if at all)?
Is stage fright linked to new customers, new projects, new tasks or something else?
Is preparation, experience, herbal tea (or anything else) an antidote to The Fear?
Don’t be scared to reveal your inner demons!
Did you enjoy this post? Why not leave a comment below and continue the conversation, or subscribe to my feed and get articles like this delivered automatically to your feed reader.
Good discussion point Paul. My own philosophy is ‘Leap and the net will appear’, which works for everything but salmon. Thanks for the post! Engaging as ever.
Thanks, Adam; great to see you here as always. A life fully lived does seem to require a bit of leaping from time to time.
That reminds me of a circus act I once had with a partner named Annette. I used to climb the trapeze ladder, leap into space, and land in Annette!
Yes, well, you know, if elephants could leap, kilo for kilo, as efficiently as the grasshopper, they’d avoid a lot of trouble with poachers.
It is these small business insights that bring me back to your blog time and time again.
Is it really the insights, Adam, or Paul’s circus jokes?
When I worked with an AFL club some years ago, we had senior players of 10+ years who were sick before every game from nerves…
Oh, the circus is no joke:
http://www.lifeonearthcartoons.com/files/pages/zippy.htm
Good point Paul, generally it is just the fear of the unknown…. We just need to have faith that our own Annette’s will be there waiting for us
I have been public speaking for close to 20 years now, always get a bit nerous
Its good, it keeps me sharp! But then again someone people that have heard me speak probably disagree 
From footy to public speaking. These useful data points may yet yield a trend. Thank you, Megan and Alain!
Great to hear you are human Paul!
I still get nervous before big projects. Even though I’ve completed numerous projects in the past, the nerves still appear and I don’t get much sleep the night before big milestones. But the nerves actually keep me on the ball!
Like you I know I can do the job, I have done it many times before and know what needs to get done… but the “stage fright” is still there. I think it keeps us grounded and ensures we do not get too complacent or arrogant.
Thank you, Sally. You’re the second to mention that nerves can be useful. I find them quite disabling. I look foward to hearing what others think too.
I do agree with you in some respects – there have been a few times where I have been far too nervous and found it a hindrance.
In those instances I tried to ’step out’ of it and look at it or take it on from a new angle/perspective.
However most of the time it keeps me on my toes!
Ooh! Goodie! The Primal stuff! You may have opened the floodgates on this one mate…excellent! Will I be naughty or nice? :- )
Cheers
Stephen G
I’ve moved all the furniture and layered the rugs. Knock yourself out, Stephen!
Just finished an NLP course which had lots of good stuff about “the fear” and how to manage it through visualisations (Stepping into the circle of excellence – my fav) would recommend as an alternative to the “go primal” option, though sometimes a good cry does help.
If there’s one thing I can speak of from experience, it’s fear :- )
I’ve been pretty much terrified of everything since…well, since my mum went into labour. Even then I hung-on for grim ’something other than death’, taking 26 hours to reluctantly emerge.
From then on it was pretty much constant terror with brief respites of mild anxiety…
I’ve encountered myriad well meaning philosophical ‘First Aid’ freebies like FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real & good ol’, some wise ‘new age’ author… was it M Scott Beck? Anyway, someone wise and financially secure fella said “Feel the Fear and do it anyway”. I like that one…I mean how can it fail? It’s like, ‘declare bankruptcy and spend someone else’s money anyway’…
So, now that I’ve declared my human frailty to all & sundry, it’s down to small business ey? :- P
I popped ‘No 1 Fear’ in Google & got 50,100,000 results!Hmmm? Prominent amongst the results is the now almost cliche No: 1 Fear – ‘Public Speaking’ (I don’t know if it actually still is – Youtube would suggest otherwise:- P)… anyway, if it is or has been, I reckon this suggests that we don’t fear objects as such, we fear each other. Good ol’ Nelson Mandela took it one step further by saying that ‘what we fear most is our own power’ (my paraphrase, I’m too lazy to put the link in).
Then there is the fear of fear & so on…ad infinitum. Not only do we have emotions, but the bluddy things are fractal!!!!
As someone starting a small business I’m often afraid that ‘professionals whose No 1 concern/focus/mission is their customers satisfaction’, won’t do what they say when they say. So far this alone has cost me nearly 4 months of lost ‘potential’ income…and do I have an avenue of redress? Nope! Not one I can afford anyway…
To give my biggest fear some perspective; when I was a child & teenager, I worked part time in a Zoo. I was the reptile curator. So by the time I was 11 I had worked literally hands-on with all of Australia’s deadliest creatures (including Crocs & Sea Snakes), caught hundreds of deadly snakes and spiders (from the wild), for zoos & serum laboratories and even worked with Lions & handled Cobras…& the only thing that has ever really made my bum go up into my tummy is ‘grown-ups’ and the legal system (which is like a huge bunch of ’semi-invincible grown-ups with an Army for every occassion’).
There, I reckon that’ll do for a start… :- P
Cheers
Stephen G
Oh and here’s one I thought might be of interest (from the Google results):
“The No 1 Fear of Executives:
The one thing that scares more business owners, executives and managers than anything else: delegating power to employees who might fail.”
http://www.scribd.com/doc/2238062/The-Number-One-Fear-of-Executives
Cheers
Me again :- P
What a life you’ve lived, Stephen! When does the autobiography come out? Thanks for that article, too.
Just one question remains: do you fear your new pizza oven?
Hi Paul,
Re: “When does the autobiography come out?” What do you think this is, ’scotch mist’? :- )
What article?
No, I am definitely not afraid of my pizza oven…I have not actually met ‘her’ yet. But as ‘dream lovers’ we have already cooked-up plenty of heavenly envy… :- P
Cheers
Stephen G
You cited an article ‘The No 1 Fear of Exectuives’ which had an interesting commentary about Bolivar.
What will you name the pizza oven? How about … Burnadette?
Oh right! That article! Doh! I’m thinkin’, “I didn’t submit any articles?” :- P
Burnadette! I love it! Might alter the spelling a tad – ‘Burn-a-debt’ (which is quite literally what I hope will occur :- ). Ooh! You did have your ‘Weeties’ this morning didn’t you? :- )
Cheers
Stephen G
Excellent, Stephen. We have inspiration, relevance and now client buy-in. I expect to see that name blazed (tee hee) over the oven door (portal? aperture? orifice?) when I make my next Canberra firework pilgrimage.
Thanks Angie. Have you read Bryce Courtenay’s The Power of One? If so, would his calm-yourself-down multiple waterfall visualisation come under the same heading as what you just did?
Mate! Observing “inspiration, relevance & client buy-in” from those couple of brief comments is a testament to your professional eye & wit :- )…if you get any sharper today, we’re going to have to wrap you in something so you don’t cut yourself or anyone else :- )
Cheers
Stephen G
PS I’ll make sure to appropriately accredit the oven’s insignia on launch…might have to do the whole ‘champagne’ smashing thing with ‘Burn-a-debt’ rolling out of a FEISTY EMPIRE semi-trailer, down a ramp onto the lawn out the front of Parliament House…(then, when I get out of jail I can start cooking pizzas :- )
Thank you to everyone’s comments. I like your article Paul – thank you. Fear and anxiety are sometimes confused – fear relates to past experiences and if we have unresolved fear based on past experiences, it can prevent us from taking action, can lead to procrastination, can debilitate us, etc. I had a huge fear of public speaking, for example, and until I addressed the underlying issues around that fear over 12 years ago now, I was unable to do a presentation without bursting into tears half way through. With that fear now fully addressed, I regularly present at business events and love it!
Anxiety relates to fear of what may happen in the future ie. when we worry and think about “what if this goes wrong” or “what if I don’t do it as well as I could”, etc. Anxiety is simply a warning from our unconscious mind to focus on what we want, instead of what we do not want. When we imagine things in the future turning out exactly the way we want, we usually get exicited rather than anxious or worried. Often when I work with professional speakers and business owners to address their fears, many times they are feeling anxiety rather than fear.
If you would like a quick 2 minute technique to address anxiety and stop worry, please do email me at vesna@qttransformation.com and I will be very happy to send this to you as a gift to empower you. Trust this helps!
Warm regards,
Vesna
Thank you, Stephen; kind comments indeed. And welcome, Vesna; what a sparkling galaxy of commentators we’re attracting! Your analysis of fear vs anxiety is most enlightening. Thank you for enhancing this discussion with your expertise.
I’m a journalist who gets huge bouts of stage fright!
I used to work on a local rag and dreaded publication day. There were two things that used to unnerve me – the reaction to stories I’d written by the subjects and the fear that our paper’s competition had picked up a great scoop.
Later, I worked on a six-weekly publication that didn’t have any competition, so that cured that fear! But as the editor, I feared that there would be a silly typo, or I’d forgotten to make an important change.
Now, I work on a fortnightly publication. Again, there’s no real competition but I still can’t bring myself to read the publication when it arrives from the printer.
Thank you Paul for your very warm welcome! I look forward to reading more of your and everyone else’s posts! Keep up the great work!
Warm regards, Vesna
Welcome Rebecca; we greatly appreciate your insight. Interesting how you only feared things that were beyond your control … until you got promoted! You’ve added yet another dimension to this debate: does fear mutate according to rank?
(PS: You’re welcome, Vesna!)
Thank you Paul and Rebecca
The interesting thing about emotions, like fear, is that they can surface or be triggered at any time. Sometimes fear is appropriate eg. if someone is walking down a dark alley at night alone in a dodgy area of town, it is probably appropriate to feel a bit of fear. However, if the thought of doing something has us feel overwhelming fear (ie. fear that is out of proportion to the situation), it is a sign that the fear is unresolved from the past.
Generally, people develop fears earlier in life and sometimes it can take many years for people to become consciously aware of their past fears. Sometimes someone will say something or do something, or an event will happen, that will bring the fear to the surface for us to deal with. The great news is that when we become aware of the fear, we are ready to resolve it.
Fear can be appropriate in some situations and not in others. Fear also takes many forms eg. fear of success, fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of not being good enough, fear of standing out, etc. It is useful to be aware of the type of fear it is as it makes it easier to address.
Hi Paul,
Maybe some cheerleaders in your life would decrease whatever is behind your fears. My personal philosophy is that others – whether they are clients, friends, family – anyone really – are NOT your Source. Nothing they think or say changes who you are or what you are able to accomplish.
No matter what they do or say they can not shake your confidence or take away from your substance. There is only one Source and when we surrender our lives to guidance and the greater good no matter what happens all is well.
Thank you for your inspiring words, IS@GM! My pets aren’t much chop at this activity, so I rely heavily on my wife and a few close friends for support. I like your take on the Source; it adds a lovely new dimension to this discussion. Best regards, P.
Well, between Annettes and Bernadettes, there’s not very much left to say on this topic. However, I personally find a little nervous energy is good – might be adrenalin I guess. Also, a friend shared this pearl of wisdom with me – when feeling anxious, ask yourself ‘what’s the worst that can happen here’, and 99 times out of 100 it really is no big deal. Of course when it IS that 1 time out of 100 and the paw paw hits the fan, you’d best be hoping that the fan is not working ! (South African philosophy).
Thank you, Stephen. It’s always a treat to get your perspective. I hope that new ebook of yours is selling its hashtag off.